Each and every day we were
such a part of one another
Morning, mid-morning
Noon, afternoon
evening, night
Your smell, taste, the feel of you in my hands
in my mouth
so unforgettable
The colors and the shape
vibrant and voluptuous
foreign and native
newly acquainted and old friends
We coexisted for 10 years
living for life--
Everyday you sustained me
Then our relationship
an unfortunate statistic
like so many
My pride and my independence stripped away
making me slip into the cold co-dependence
a vacuum- only you, only me
Addiction, yes, you were my drug
it was to you, to my sorrow, to my self-pity
the addiction, the needle in my veins
Moderation was our past
My gluttony destroyed us
it destroyed me
The second 10 years- limbo
the horror plateaued
my dependence and my neuroses- the norm
The final 7
I loved you
I hated you
You allowed me to live
but you were killing me slowly
and I laid down, pupils dilated, and let you
Weeping, abounding sorrows
enrapturing anger, abounding fears
melancholy and despair
You were always there
watching me and partaking in the sin
overstaying your welcome
We shall no longer be intertwined
like the mating praying mantises
death not following such pleasure
No longer do you complete me
No longer shall I succumb to you
For now I am the one who survives- only I will have the control
1 comments:
Ahhh it's one good message. It's cool watching these huge shifts that you making. *Russian bear hug*
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